MY CARELESS MOTHER – Episode two. My father became my magical being; I almost could not do without him. I trusted him so much because he never hurt me. He tried to keep tears from dropping from my eyes. He was the friend I knew; he was close and listening.
He was something different from my mother who was harsh, inconsiderate, unloving and hot tempered. I wasn’t worried about anything because my father was also nice to my siblings alike. Myself, and Grace took after my father in everything but Faith and Christy took after mum. They are unfriendly and difficult.
My bond and intimacy with my father continued until I finished my Junior Secondary School Education and my mother began to nurse the idea of changing my day school to boarding. From the onset, I knew that won’t work because my dad would not part with me neither will I ever want to stay away from dad for such a long time. So it was going to be one against two. It became a serious battle between dad and mum for a long time. Grandma had to interven but all to no avail. Our pastor intervened too on several occasions but my dad would not shift grounds. “I will not take any of my daughters to boarding school and allow anyone to initiate them into witchcraft”, my dad had said several times.
My dad was the first to know when I started menstruating. I had menstruated twice before my mum knew. Before mum could teach me what I needed to know about a woman’s circle my dad already did. Mum’s lecture on womanhood was a revision. Dad already taught me everything I needed to know. My dad got to know a minute after I fell sick. My dad was readily available for us, unlike mum who gave so much time to her career. I would rather confide in my dad than waste my time with mum. She rarely had time to listen to you. If she does, she won’t act until something bad happens.
My mum was a successful banker, an occupation she held with high esteem. Her job meant so much to her because she worked hard to rise to the position she occupied in her bank. Even when mum was sick, she would manage to go to work.
First lesson I learnt from my mum was; the danger of making your career a priority over your family. She gave her best to her career but little attention to us. Her intention sounds genuine but her mistakes could not justify her intention.
Dad was a nominal Christian but mum was a born again Christian with proofs of right standing with God. Dad still sneaks to smoke even though he was a prominent member of the choir. Mum was a prayer warrior and Sunday school teacher. Her fluent English and good communication skills made her one of the best Sunday school teacher in our church. Everyone liked her class because you will always learn a new vocabulary after her teaching. Dad is not a bad person but he was not as serious with God like mum.
They couldn’t stay in the same room because mum will not let dad have a smooth night with her unending prayers and vigils. Mum was not tolerant, she sees dad as an unbeliever, hence she nags and yells at dad almost every day. As I began to grow up, I realized that mum and dad hardly spent time together. Mum was just too busy with office and church work. Dad would have been lonely without us. We became his close confidants while mum was unavailable.
To be continued…………….
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